Speak #4

So by the title you can obviously tell I am still reading Speak. Melinda is still having a tough time. Her grades are dropping, she's still hated by her ex best friends, and her new friend Heather wants to desperately fit in, even tho fitting in won't be so easy for Melinda. The thing about we parents is that they don't seem like the nicest parents. Her dad starts yelling at Melinda about the grades. While her mom tries to calmly ask Melinda to get her grades up, her dad starts yelling right away. "Cut the crap. She knows what's up." He was really angry. But the things that took me by surprise was Melinda's mom. "We're not asking for much dear. We just want you to do your best. And we know your best is so much better than this. You tested so well dear. Look at me when I talk to you." At the last statement her mother makes, obvious frustration is shown. "I said look at me." At that moment Melinda's mom grabs a knife. She yells "Look at me," multiple times. But Melinda just say there like nothing was happening. Her father didn't even try to stop her mom. (This was probably one of the most surprising things I've read in this book) Heather is looking to join many clubs. Now she wants to join the musical. Melinda says on her head, "The musical would be too easy for me. I am a good actor." What she means is that she's always faked a smile. She always fakes a mood. People can't really tell that something is bothering her internally. She just whips a smile on and she's ready to go. Melinda still thinks trying to fit in would be a bad idea. 

If you would look at Melinda's character overall, you would say she is the type of person to keep things in. In other words, she's lonely. Over the summer she lost her group of friends. Including her best friend Rachel. "Her eyes meet mine for a second. "I hate you," she mouths silently." Rachel even pretends Melinda doesn't exist. She wants to desperately tell them why she never answered, why she never even contacted them. But she can't. It's too embarrassing. Secondly, Melinda doesn't have the best life at home. Her mom is never there, so she has order pizza almost everyday. When her dad arrives home she runs up to her room and hides. When he arrives he already takes a cup and pours himself some booze. Of course she lets him know she's here, but she doesn't come down until her mom arrives, or diner is ready. "I won't take a real nap. I have this halfway place, a rest stop on the road to sleep, where I can stay for hours. I don't even need to close my eyes, just stay safe under the covers and breathe." She leaves her home problems at home, and her school problems at school. But she never tells anyone. Not even her new friend Heather. Melinda keeps it all inside.